P for Papercut.

I've felt quite depressed lately, just because not my school work but i just have a feeling that something or some part is disappearing in my life, im not sure what did happen to me, but i feel so unnatural lately. Hmm...just maybe after ive watched a jdorama so called "densha otoko (train man)". I love the series much because it happened just like me last time. But I love the story because it is indeed like a fairy tale in the reality world, it is hard to admit that it wont happen in daily life but sometimes we will find a hard time to find a suitable life-time partner. S

Sometimes I felt upset, but i dont know why, and sometimes i felt something is empty inside me. Ive almost done everything to cover it up, but its still the same thing. But something really obvious to me is that everytime I enjoyed watching the series, I was indeed enjoyed it, but after watching it...i felt sadly, maybe i just also want to be like him lolz...just because im also still single though. But ive tried to make my life as interesting as possible. But seems that im going to miss that series because it only left 1 episode that i havent watched...seems that i really dont want to watch it because i dont want it just ends like that. Am i a -ve thinker or just +ve thinker apart this matter??? Im also not sure. But seems that I have to end it soon because the longer i postpone for watching the series, the more anxious i am. So.....

ok..that's all for today, just felt free only to post something...all right have a good day then ^^

A normal day for me of course, but today seems a little bit special, today after going for tuition class then i straightly went back home instead of going somewhere else. Hmm... its the first time for me to go home such early. Then, first thing first, EAT!!! I was so starving that moment that I could take 2 times the meal that moment. Then I went for my essay writing and took a nap of course. And then went to my grandma's house. But after that , me and my family went for dinner, and the moment we had our dinner, we walked to the car park. What made me curious was the moment I saw 3 persons who are "visionless" and had the difficulties to cross along the road, they really cross the road with sticks with them, and 3 of them were helping each other and cover each other to make it to the opposite road bank. Their determination to cross the road was so strong and attract my attention. A motor with high speed passed by and they sensed it and they step backward for safety. Then they continue to make their way to opposite site. My mother saw it and told me to give them a hand, I was in hesitation and answered my mom " ah? er...ok" I wanted to go to help them and once i move some steps toward them, they managed to cross the road safely. I felt relief they crossed the road, but something suddenly pop-up in my mind. I was thinking that why i was in hesitation in the moment i want to give aid to other people??? Am i dont have the will to help??? or Am i to coward to move forward to give people a hand??? OR am i too unconfidence to help???...Many questions suddenly pop-up in my mind and I just cant have the way to answer those enquiries. But what really remind me always is "take care of our eyes as its the only vision we have, once loss it, we will live in dark". This quote always remind me to take care of my eyes as I get through some though days few years ago as i have some tiny problem about my eye. But as a conclusion, I wont be in hesitation next time when people need help or they didnt mention also. And Im willing to help out if there who needs help from me. Thanks...and take care^^

There arent much things surprised me lately, but just something made me very frustrated recently. Firstly, I failed in my motorcycle test which made me need to take a retest, and as a consequence I have to be in that same place again which i dislike much. Then, secondly my school works. It has been a few months since i entered the form 6 which is a whole new schooling environment, the main things that really makes me frustrated is about my enquiry about learning to be a better mine. But I got the idea on how to proceed it but Im lack of determination to continue what ive planned to do as i planned. Thirdly, the school donations thingys. It really made me crazy recently as I need to go out myself to collect the fund, darn it. It was quite a time wasting and of course a way of energy wasting. Im not saying it was a bad things or it was a bad task that we've taken but in fact it was quite hard for is to reach the "quota" that we need to. Conversely, if can I would really put some money in it and just hand it to the school authority. But, it really exhausting doing this stuffs indeed. Whatever... darn it I wrote this... damn so unsatisfied with these piss thingys...

Tues- It was a normal day for me again, and i was kept thinking of something, chance of riding on a motor, myself one hehe. But then , I need to be more patient as my motorcycle wont be arrived as early as they promised to me. But i know i can just have to wait a few more days and I could get a ride on it with joy^^. Erm...nothing happened, so -ended- hehe...

Wed- Er...today was quite an interesting day as I could attened a lesson because of the teacher that taught us, he was nice and with sense of humor, who knows he wasnt nice at that day and released his temper at us, of course we also didnt wrong also so, we deserved it. But then. at least I got a lesson from his advice, that was... respect, responsible, logical thinking. But then it was quite good then, at least we realize what we had done. Er...later had a football match with friends. ^^ very interesting as i could perform my best to play...i was rather satisfied as I knew i was better than the very very last time hehe. So...feeling so greatz that moment...only scorred a goal for myself but it was a precious one^^

Thus- Today not a bad day, but it was a bad weather for this early morning, storm breaks the early calm morning, but with shiny, bright, peace, and of course rather hot afternoon. But then , it was quite nice for mea s I rode car to school, but seems not a good matter for motorcyclists as they need to rush to school to avoid the downpour. But today nothing happened, ah...my friend who was just stop his studies from now on to continue his multimedia design courses at provate college. So...rather sad because lost a friend to be joint at school. Hmmm...today I was just felt want to complete my blog and stop extend the time for blog the old entries. I felt it was not my style as I hate it. Ok...that's for all...good luck guys^^

Today was quite a rush day for me as i need to go for motorcycle pratical as i need to refresh myself once i came back from school and need to rush for the pratical. Er... after arriving there, I was quite confident for myself that this time I could have riden or controliing the motor well. Who knows........L've done it . LOLz...anyway it was greatz... and besides that I managed to balance myself and driving with constant speed so well and "bota-licious"-interesting ride. Er...after an hour of riding, I was called to end the training. So once reached home, I felt quite well and feeling great... Err...but I couldnt write this blog on that day, as this post is extended posted one. But anyway it was still the same, same matter with different post time only.^^ But then at night I have to attend for a new class for my physics tuition, I wasnt new to that place as i got friends also, but I was kinda not so satisfied with the surroundings there, it was quite narrow and coldy place, but nevermind, it was quite a good place for a lesson also, so ganbantte la^^

Today supposed to be a lazy day for me as i can rest at home, even i was so so lazy to get out to get myself a meal for lunch time. But then...after taking lunch, i took a nap instead revising my homework >.<# But an hour later, my dad woke me up and what were they tell me was, "lets go and have a look on motor" In a sudden, my heart tells me that, the time has come but it was also lazy for me to take a single move. But finally i took my dad's car and went to one of the motor shop there. "HOT AND SPICY" that i can describe the shop, it was so hot the atmosphere there and so spicy with those various motorcycles. Erm...then we had a look on those motors, and what made me so interesting was the auto one with Modenas, Yamaha, Comel. Err...it was quite nice and finally I have chosen one... the Passion 125, auto of course ^^ hehehe...

Then...it surely made me so happy and so excited that I couldnt describe my happiness in words. So at night i went to join my friend's birthday party, and of course have a chat with friends^^. Ahh...that day my heart was so nice...and guess what...im getting more and more courages riding and learning a good motoring skill...^^

It had been some great days lately although nothing much happened, but what made me so delighted is, I FINALLY CAN HAVE MY 2nd collection of their concert, L`Arc~en~Ciel. And completed downloading Scary Movie 1-4 for my sis. And also succeded backup some of my jpop albums^^ and finally I CAN PLAY ALL O2jam's paid songs and free one. WAO!!! that's a totally unbelievable for me to get so many great stuffs just in 2-3 days time, and moreover, I've joint a tuition class yesterday and noticed that Im really need tuition to guide me along for this one & a half year. So, it is quite an interesting tuition for me since that it is just a small class and the teacher is quite nice and i understood what is he teaching about. So...nothing much happened lately, and finally i've also learnt how to operate the motorcycle and furthermore i will get a L Licence for myself and guess what, hope for a new vehicle...er...suddenly I felt that my mind was blank, like I was brain washed with maths and ive no idea on how to write using vocab. Er...seems that I have to read more articles... aih...good luck then^^